Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Treating other people with respect

re-post

We should always do our utmost to treat other people with respect.

All of us have little things that we are sensitive about. Other people might find it hard to understand those things and may think we are oversensitive about them. However, that does not mean that we should not take those things into consideration.

For instance, some people may not like to hear bad language. If so, you should try as hard as you can not to swear when in that person's company. You may think that is silly. You may think they have the problem, not you and they should deal with it. I disagree. I think that you should respect the fact that those people do not like bad language.

Some people may not like you to smoke when there children are present. You may think that is silly, after all they are not going to be affected by you smoking just one cigarette in front of them. However, perhaps these people do not want you to set an example to your children. You should respect that.

Likewise, some people do not want shoes to be worn inside their homes. This is something important to them.

You may think this is daft. If it is for cultural reasons you may think "They are living in the UK not in China." If it is to protect the carpet you may think "Carpets are meant to be walked on." That is fine. You are entitled to your opinion. However, you should still treat their preference with respect. They are fellow human beings who have the right to their preferences and opinions as much as you do. So please don't complain if you are asked to remove your shoes in such homes.

We should also not be afraid to state our preferences. Nobody is going to know that you would rather they avoided using bad language in front of their children unless you tell them this. In the same way nobody will know that you would like shoes-off in your house unless you make it clear. There is nothing wrong with expressing how you feel and asserting your wishes. You have the right to be respected.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have only ever been asked once to remove my shoes when visiting someone's home. But I have done so many times without prompting because I believe in treating other people's property with respect.
I don't insist on visitors removing their shoes; I simply hope people treat my home with a bit of respect. But living in the UK it's a forlon hope.
Last week a young woman who I know through work visited my home for the first time. She took two steps through my front door, stopped, and very casually slipped off her high heels before walking on into my living room in her tights.
While we were chatting I asked why she had taken her shoes off without being asked ?
She said her own home was on a new estate where houses were still being built. It was a bit of a building site still and people who visited her ran the risk of trailing muck through her house. So she had started to insist visitors remove their shoes. And she then had started to think, "If my home deserves to be kept clean, so does someone elses." So now, if she turns up at someone's house and thinks, "This is a nice place", she takes her shoes off at the door.

Celestial Fundie said...

Thanks so much for visiting and leaving your comment.

It is not unknown for people to remove their shoes without being asked and it seems more common here in the south than in the midlands.

However, I think asking people nicely is the best course, given that it is not necessarilly the norm to remove shoes.

God Bless

Matthew